Clemson fans officially enter Austerity

If you’ve read The Guardian (UK), NewStatesman (UK) or Le Monde (France) the past year, you likely noticed a catchy new europhrase to describe all the economic collapses and other malgoings-on in places like Spain, Greece, Ireland and, when it comes to university education and specifically tuition hikes, The Realm.

“Austerity”.

Which basically describes a period of widespread and enormous hardship. And with the release of Clemson president James Barker’s blog where he and university board chairman David Wilkins endorsed failed athletic director Terry Don Phillips and failed head football coach Dabo Swinney, many fans, especially the long-time ones, will begin enduring said hardship.

“Cut the hyperbole; it’s just a game silly!”

Wrong. When you’re talking about fans who’ve spent thousands of their hard-earned dollars each year on IPTAY membership dues, season ticket purchases and tailgating paraphernalia, it’s no longer a game. It’s an investment. And some people spend tens of thousands of dollars each year on games.

Thinking people who view it as “just a game” don’t spend that kind of coin. Unless they’re naive, which many Clemson fans are unfortunately.

No pun intended, but while the HSAS at Clemson isn’t at red alert, it’s a damn solid orange. I shouldn’t have to remind fans of the failures of Phillips, Barker or Swinney (okay, I’ll throw you a bone - Bowden extension then firing him six games later then promoting in experienced receiver coach to head coach, manipulating classroom metrics to climb a magazine’s abstract ranking, meddling in Billy Napier’s playcalling which directly causes offensive failures, respectively), so when university brass endorses this clear string of failure, it sends a clear message to the fans.

“We don’t care and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

They believe this because they know that Clemson fans not just among the most loyal in the nation, but they are so to a big fault. They know many fans have this religious worship of everything Clemson, or that they’re addicted, and they know these fans will pony up their money no matter what. It makes no sense but the fans nor the administration cares.

What the university is to fans is what a televangelist is to the poor elderly. It’s sickening and wrong, but the duped masses “believe” anyway.

Hell, there are many fans who have zero faith in the university, the athletic department and the football program but they still toss Clemson their salad anyway. It’s ridiculous and pathetic. Talk about a bunch of rubes.

In the end, you’ll see Clemson’s fans continuing to shovel money at their addiction, incorrectly thinking that to not give money is the worse alternative, Clemson football will continue to go 7-8 regular season wins with no ACC titles and a quaternary, quinary or senary bowl per year and then reward its bad head coach a contract extension for stability purposes. There will be an outcry, then Clemson will sign a top-15 recruiting class, the fans will rejoice, spring ball will come and Swinney and company will laud the players’ efforts (as if he really is capable of accurately analyzing players), fans will buy into it, summer comes and we hear more hype, fall comes and fans discover that this or that freshman is tearing it up, the hype goes through the roof once again until...

The season starts and Clemson, as normal, looks barfy right out of the gate. Seven to eight regular season wins ensues, no ACC titles...well, you get it.

The cycle starts once again and fans, particularly those who’ve been around for decades, have been stuck in it.

But this time there is no hope of change. Or at least positive change. Because he is his golden boy, Swinney is going nowhere as long as Phillips runs the athletic department, and as we now know from Barker and Wilkins, Phillips is going nowhere as long as Barker is there. And Barker is going nowhere.

The failed status quo is firmly entrenched at Clemson, and the fans and players, believe it or not, will suffer the consequences. Fans will give their money and time for naught, and the players will suffer because they will not be properly coached and developed, much less prepared for the NFL, the dream of many top high school prospects.

Firing off e-mails to the board or the president won’t do. Putting up billboards won’t change a thing. Bitching on message boards is pissing against the wind.

I’m not even certain stopping your contributions will change anything. But at least you won’t be wasting your money any longer.

And at this point, that’s the only way Clemson fans can exit their austerity.

It's over - Max Lennon has won.

Last rumors we've all heard on the possible departure of Clemson athletic director Terry Don Phillips don't offer any resounding hope for athletics, particularly football.

After the past few weeks of hearing of TDP being on a hot seat, that the university board of trustees have taken keen interest in Phillips' leadership for the past year or two, Phillips is out by year's end, and all that, we're now hearing that university president James Barker is not only not going to force Phillips out but that Phillips left the meeting with Barker encouraged?

It's almost a law of physics at this point: whatever encourages Barker and Phillips should be discouraging to fans.

At this point, as fans you have to be solidly in the fifth stage of grief: acceptance. How anyone can still get pissed over the endless stream of poor decisions made by athletic department officials and university brass? This has been 25 years in the making when then-president Max Lennon launched a war against Clemson's nationally-vaunted football program with his “academics will never be subordinate to athletics” manifesto.

But that was then, and this is now. And the mediocrity will....check that, let's not call this phenomenon at Clemson “mediocrity” anymore. This is failure.

Sure, Clemson posts non-losing seasons in football, as the administration is clearly not playing to win as much as they're playing not to lose. But when you have the facilities Clemson has, the fan support, the money (it's there, y'all, Clemson is solidly in the black), the recruits, the tradition and so on and you continue to fall short every single time, that's failure. Because failure is determined by what resources you have available to you and what success is defined as being (ACC title), and when you can't be successful in a terrible football conference with SEC-level resources, you're a failure. Plain and simple.

Laziness, frugality, unjustified arrogance, complacency, visionless, just-another-day-at-the-office – this is the energy at Clemson right now. Abject carelessness and resentment toward anything football by university leadership has been so strong for decades that it's spilled over into all other sports. Clemson athletics has had a significant overall drop in ACC championships, swimming and diving programs have been dropped, and an all-time low morale lives inside Jervey walls as verbal abuse by one or more athletic officials has been widely reported.

How Death Valley still stuffs 70,000+ most autumn Saturdays amazes me. If this were any other school whose fans cared about athletics more than the administration, you wouldn't have near that number.

But at Clemson, you do. And it's because fans have long had this religious loyalty to football, and religion can be a very blinding entity. I direct you to the followers of Muslim extremism and wacko Christian evangelism for evidence. But I do know one thing - you don't make some earthly entity or person (like a coach) into a god, and then follow him into hell. Nor do you don't allow yourself to be put into a position to where if you are considering not giving to Clemson anymore that the university or its henchmen guilt you out of it by convincing you that if you stop giving then you'll be taking food out of some “poor” player's mouth. That just makes you a dumbass and you deserve to get taken for a ride by the carnies at Clemson University if you're this stupid.

How else do you explain why 70,000+ show up every autumn Saturday after spending thousands of hard-earned dollars (in this economy no less) on IPTAY dues, season tickets and tailgating paraphernaila to watch a chronically-failed football program at work? It's religion and that's what the university is counting on. For you to be so blindly loyal that you continue to giving these carnies dollar on top of dollar and they continue to do the same failed things they've always done. They're taking you for a ride – you just haven't realized it yet.

Perhaps it's time for you to wake up a bit out of your drunken stupor from that orange kool-aid bender you've been on for 20 years. Perhaps you should consider other outlets for your entertainment, or pursue some other life path that won't lead you into failure for once. Cut bait and move on from fishing in the same spot that hasn't given you a bite in years.

In other words, if the university doesn't care about athletic success and ACC championships in football, why should you? As a fan you can't do anything to overcome poor leadership. The boosters can't even do that. Clemson's proved it for years.

If you're still worried that if you stop giving then you're turning your back on “your kids”? Don't worry, Clemson graduates numerous people every year, they'll be more than happy to take your spot and loyally feed those starving players in your absence.

Because after all, there's a sucker born every minute.

Fan departures and the hypocritical pumper backlash

So I perused a Clemson fansite and came across this 25-year-old guy whose only Clemson football experience is the dreaded Hatfield and West years. To wit: he never experienced what a championship Clemson team.

You know about message boards, right? Those whose posters coach Dabo Swinney referred to as “irrelevant” in his post-game press conference after the inexplicable loss to Florida State? The third swipe he’s taken at fans this season?

Dude went on to say that he’s quitting his Clemson patronage after this season because he’s sick of it.

Gotta say, I’m impressed with the forethought and wisdom in this young man, as he is seeing the writing on the wall at such an early age, a wall scrawling that people twice his age have yet to realize.

It is indeed disheartening, discouraging, and every other dis to be a Clemson football fan nowadays. No conference title in almost 20 years, no 10-win season, no BCS bowl invite, nothing. It’s become a waste of time, energy and money for many fans, and this 25-year-old has accepted this fact at such an early age.

Gives you a glimmer of hope that those of his age aren’t all a bunch of Jersey Shore-watching, Facebook-posting, Halo-3 nerdberries.

There were some who understood his pain but, as expected, there was a backlash from the Pumper commune.

“Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.”

“Calm down.”

“While you’re at it cancel your subscription.”

“Take all those fair-weather fans with you.”

Those are a few of the comments. The fact these come from the Pumpers is funny on many levels.

Funny strange, not funny ha-ha.

First, the pumpers are largely the group that bitch and moan about the “haters” dividing the fanbase with their negativity. Yet when a fed-up fan decides to quit on Clemson, which I understand completely, they launch into said fan, effectively dividing the fanbase themselves with their negativity.

But the haters largely direct their negativity toward Swinney, Terry Don Phillips, James Barker and the board of trustees. These morons, on the other hand, direct their negativity at other fans and, in sleight of hand fashion, at the players with their “we don't have the talent we think we do” crap. So, who is dividing the fanbase more?

Second, I’ve noticed after an inexplicable loss, which are many, when the realists launch into Swinney, TDP, etc then the pumpers come out and say something like “it’s just a game.” But when a fan such as the guy above realizes it is just that and gives it up, the same pumpers launch into him for not being a true fan like them. They basically bid a nasty farewell by saying “good riddance, we don’t need fans like you!”

But I thought this was just a game, right? If it’s just a game, then why are you getting all riled up over a fan who decides this so-called “game” is no longer worth his time and resources and decides to live life differently?

To the pumpers, it is just a game when Clemson loses. But when Clemson wins it is the start of something “special”. And when a justifiably disgruntled fan departs, these same people label him as a bad fan.

The pumper crowd rears its duplicitous head when fans decide to take direct action instead of pouring money into a failed program and burn a candle by their bedside hoping for the best as they do. It’s like the pumpers want the whole of Clemson’s fanbase to be just like them - a throng of rubes who are continually taken on a ride by the university’s marketing and public relations arms. To dutifully eat the same old shit sandwich the university feeds them and like it out of some warped moral obligation to “the kids”.

Clearly, Clemson’s fanbase is still divided into two distinct camps - the “true” fans, a.k.a. the pumpers, and the realists, a.k.a., the haters. Who knows the percentage of each but judging the message boards it appears slightly in favor of the realists but not by much.

But it’s rather like Congress. Sure one party has a majority, but there’s still enough of the minority party to be obstructionist and bring everything to a halt.

Until Clemson’s fanbase gets to about three-fourths of one side or the other, you’ll have this infighting but the infighting will continue regardless if the underachievement continues. Hopefully the future three-fourths will be those with a brain and clear vision and will see the deplorable state the football program is in and demand (not hope for) change.

But forget all this verbose bluster - I thought it was just a game?

Swinney insults fans for third time

From Swinney's press conference post-FSU...

"We still have a lot out there, trying to get bowl eligible this week."

Really? A bowl invite is "a lot" to Swinney? Who doesn't get invited to a bowl? Losers get bowl invites nowadays, so Clemson will be in good company.

"Last night, offensively, just missed opportunities. We moved the ball down the field but again some kicking miscues that cost us some points in the red zone. For whatever reason that's where our miscues are coming."

So, Swinney's throwing the kicking game under the bus for this loss? As if his offense had nothing to do with it? Yeah the kicking was horrific but clearly Swinney is passing the buck and blaming Chandler Catanzaro and Co. for this loss. Nowhere did he mention offensive woes (he did praise Kyle Parker for an "excellent" showing even though he had two picks against zero scores and only a 5.4 yard average). Speaking of miscues costing points, how about getting first and goal inside the 10 in the second and you can't punch it into the end zone? How is that a kicker's fault? Or first and 10 at the FSU 14 and your quarterback you can't stop raving about throws a pick on second down? Was that Catanzaro's fault too?

"...we have several dinged up"

See how he slipped the injury excuse in?

"We have a lot of good things happening in recruiting and a bunch of good kids we've redshirted."

Using recruiting as his human shield. Nice. Very vajayjay.

"I don't pay any attention to what some people on some message board may say. That's totally irrelevant to what reality is."

This is the third time Swinney's insulted the fans (first the quacking ducks snap, then the "crazy" five percenters, now this). Earth to Swinney, message board or not these are still real, fleshy fans who pay thousands a year in IPTAY memberships, season tickets and tailgating paraphernalia and have supported Clemson through thick and thin for decades, you know, the ones paying your unjustified salary...and you're failing them left and right. You best realize they're very relevant. They're tired of the mediocrity and they're tired of you dismissing them as 'irrelevant" or otherwise.

As I said in a previous blog entry, you've proven beyond the shadow of a doubt you're completely immature and can't handle the stresses that go with a head coaching job. You're like a four-year-old who didn't heed your parents' warnings and went out into the ocean as the tide is going out and now you're being carried out to sea while the lifeguard is getting his third nap of the day in. You're a lame-duck coach...well, you're just lame. Speaking of 'what reality is", your record since taking over as head coach is 14-13 when you remove all non-BCS foes except TCU. You suck and don't realize it because you're arrogant and stupid.

"There will be a time where we'll look back at this and we'll say 'Wow, we've made a lot of progress.'"

Just how delusional are you? Please, research Seroquel, then consume some.

We've definitely seen enough

See post below...

Don't blame me for being ahead of the curve.

Clemson head coach (and athletic director) candidates

I was considering not posting this right now, but on second thought I think we’ve seen enough. Don’t you?

I mean, I'm no longer willing to wait around two more years for coach Dabo Swinney's impending failure to prove itself when the writing is and has been on the wall since he was hired. The proof is there, anyone who doesn't see it is blind. Fans did that "two more years" crap with Tommy Bowden every time he had a strong recruiting class and it never paid off, and I'm not about to do it with a guy who is even less qualified than Bowden was.

But for Clemson to merely replace Swinney while keeping athletic director Terry Don Phillips around is like, well, getting an oil change while not getting your broken tie rods fixed. Merely changing the oil won’t do.

However if Clemson does fix its tie rods, it still has to change the oil. You can't solve the problem (TDP) and leave the symptoms as-is (Swinney) and think you're healed. When you're sick and you end up getting cured, the symptoms naturally go away. If you are "healed" and still experience symptoms, you're not really healed are you?

But Clemson does need an oil change regardless, so let’s start there. Some realistic replacements for Swinney might be:

Gary Patterson, head coach, TCU

Sure he turned Clemson down before, but if you were being interviewed by apathetic director Phillips wouldn’t you? Would you want to work for him? With a respectable AD running the ship, one that measures success only in championships, Patterson may be interested.

Regardless, Patterson’s track record at TCU speaks for itself. Multiple conference championships (across multiple conferences no less), BCS bowls, beating up on BCS foes including yours truly, what’s not to like? The only thing holding him back at TCU is the corrupt BCS system, which will never allow his Horned Frogs to play for the National Championship. For as good as TCU is, and they are indeed quite the program, Patterson would have a far better chance of playing for a NC at Clemson than at TCU. Proper university support being assumed, that is.

Although Patterson is not the most gettable, he is the most ideal on my board. The most gettable would be...

Gus Malzahn, offensive coordinator, Auburn

This guy will get snapped up by a BCS school sooner than later. This is one of those ‘mark it down’ moments. Arkansas offensive coordinator in ’06 when the Hogs last won the SEC West, then spent two years at Tulsa where he fielded the nation’s top offenses those years, and now at undefeated Auburn where he is coaching Heisman candidate quarterback Cam Newton. Swinney only says he’s never failed. Malzahn has actually never failed thus far in major college football.

Malzahn is probably the most gettable candidate on my board.

Rich Rodriguez, head coach, Michigan

Was Tommy Bowden’s first offensive coordinator at Clemson and then went on to his alma mater West Virginia in 2001. I don’t think I need to expound upon Rich-Rod’s successes at Clemson and West Virginia.

Admittedly he’s struggling in Ann Arbor. So much that he’s on a hot seat and may not make it to the end of the year. If so, he would be prime pickings for Clemson, and I don’t think anyone in Tigertown would hold Rich Rod accountable for his failures at Michigan. Clemson is more like West Virginia than Michigan so he would be a better fit here than in Ann Arbor.

But like for Patterson, would Rich Rod work for someone as incompetent and careless as Phillips?

Vic Koenning, defensive coordinator, Illinois

Was Tommy Bowden’s DC for four years through the 2008 season, when Koenning fielded strong defenses throughout his time at Clemson. Sure he has an elastic defensive philosophy, but stats don’t lie, as Clemson’s defenses were chronically in the nation’s top-20 in yardage allowed and scoring. Not to mention the fact he’s prepared and sent a shitload of players to the NFL (Gaines Adams, Phillip Merling, Michael Hamlin, Darell Scott, Chris Clemons, Anthony Waters, etc). There is a track record of measureable success with Koenning, unlike with Swinney.

Koenning also has head coaching experience via Wyoming. But although Koenning failed there, who wouldn’t? Clemson needs someone who is qualified, has measureable success and is competent. It doesn’t need someone who can raise the dead. (Well, maybe it does.)

Koenning is probably just as gettable as Malzahn, and it is my opinion that a responsible athletic director would have awarded the Clemson head coaching job to Koenning before to Swinney.

Bud Foster, defensive coordinator, Virginia Tech

This guy has historically fielded top defenses, period. He knows how to punch an opposing offense in the mouth to where they don’t get up. Why this guy hasn’t been snapped up by now is beyond me.

I’ll retract my statements about Koenning and Malzahn as being most gettable. Foster is by far the most gettable, as he publicly stated he would jump at the chance at the Clemson job if offered. He said that back in 2008 so I can only assume he’d still jump on it.

Kevin Steele, defensive coordinator, Clemson

Steele’s candidacy will be controversial, as he is in fact part of an overall failure of a coaching staff. His defenses have been erratic and unpredictable up until the past few games, for certain. But his candidacy will only be legitimate if his defenses continue to be a dominant ACC force, as at the time of this writing Clemson defense is first in the ACC in touchdown scoring and tied for eighth in the nation in the same category. And touchdown scoring is arguably the top KPI for defenses in my mind. Yeah it's frustrating to see a defense let an opposing offense drive down the field, but if they end up giving it away or you force them to settle for a field goal, you just made them waste a lot of time, and that can demoralize them.

Outside of Clemson, has coached at top schools, has coached in the NFL and was Baylor’s head coach at one time. But like with Koenning, it’s extremely rare and difficult to win at Baylor so I can’t hold his failures there against him.

But, again we’ll have to wait and see how his defenses fare the rest of the season. If it implodes against Florida State and South Carolina, then his candidacy will be immediately retracted.

Quick list of who I would not consider, at all, no way in hell:

• anyone on the current staff except for Kevin Steele
• Bobby Bentley
• Bobby Johnson
• Troy Calhoun
• Mark Richt
• Danny Ford (let’s give it a rest, okay?)
• Ellis Johnson
• Tommy Bowden
• Rob Spence

Why would you want any of these guys when Foster, Malzahn and Koenning would be all over this?

Now, on to the tie rods. Possible replacements for Terry Don Phillips and the era of laziness and complaceny.

Jeff Davis, Asst. AD for Player Relations and External Affairs, Clemson University

Forget football for a moment, where he won Clemson’s only national championship then played for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers for several years. This guy has made quite the life for him and his family after football. Started the Call Me Mister program at Clemson, which according to Clemson’s website “seeks to recruit, train, certify, and secure employment for African-American males as elementary teachers in the state's public schools. In 2001, he was awarded $100,000 for the program from Oprah Winfrey's ‘Angel Network.’”

Ordained minister on top of that, and you have a monster of ambassador for Clemson, which is what Phillips is nowhere close to being. Davis has proven he can connect with the people and can raise funds, two things Phillips fails at miserably. Clemson needs a positive force running the show, and Davis more than qualifies.

The only knock against Davis is a guilt-by-association thing. He’s part of a poor athletic department now, and that may be cause for concern. But I’m not certain fans would object to his promotion.

Dwight Clark

Played at Clemson and produced so well there that he was handpicked by Niner head coach Bill Walsh for the draft. He went on to San Francisco, earned accolades for the legendary “Catch” where he helped lead the Niners to an NFC championship. They went on to win the city’s first Super Bowl, which was the launching salvo in the 49ers becoming one of the elite NFL franchises.

After his playing career he was a team executive for the Niners and the Cleveland Browns. So he clearly knows how to run a football program from a front office standpoint, unlike Phillips.

He lives in California, reportedly, and has established a life there, so I wonder if he would be interested in the job to begin with. Nonetheless, he would be a great hire and quite frankly, Clark is choice No. 1 on my board.

Mark Richardson

Former Clemson player who went on to help create the Carolina Panthers NFL franchise, where he served as President. Like Clark, he has playing and front office experience which only lends more credibility to a hire.

Danny Ford

I was on the fence about this. On one hand I think Clemson should let the memory of Danny Ford be just that - a memory. Like Davis he is a great ambassador for Clemson and would do well, but due to his age Ford is no long-term solution. I would take Ford in a New York minute for interim athletic director while they search for a permanent replacement.

But then again a couple years ago Nebraska hired the then-71-year-old Tom Osborne to be interim AD in Lincoln, only to make him the permanent director later. In his interim Osborne kicked the failed (and arrogant) Bill Callahan to the curb and hired Bo Pelini, who was a very successful defensive coordinator prior to taking the Nebraska job. If all Ford did was clean house in Jervey and kick Swinney and his bunch of failures to the curb, replacing him with a candidate with actual proven qualifications, that would galvanize Clemson fans and give them some level of true hope, unlike in many, many years.

Quick list of who I would not consider, at all, no way in hell:

• anyone currently in the Department except for Davis (hell, they all need to be fired)
• Tommy Bowden
• Ken Hatfield
• Bobby Johnson
• Dabo Swinney
• Rob Spence
• Brad Scott
• Bobby Bentley (I know some of you have a hard-on for him)
• anyone in an ACC school’s front office
• anyone in a Big East school’s front office
• anyone from any South Carolinian school

Worth mentioning: if a new head coach was hired and they asked me about position coaches who I think would be good defensive coordinators, I’d recommend Mike Ekeler, Nebraska’s linebackers coach. Long-time pupil of Bo Pelini, a fiery recruiter and was instrumental in the resurgence of Nebraska’s Black Shirt defense.

Clemson officials resent football? Not impossible.

A noted Clemson fan on a Tiger message board out there on the interweb had his opinion of the state of the football program posted (with his permission of course). Basically he argued that the university administration is willfully killing the football program so it won’t prostrate the academic side of the school as it is perceived to have done during football’s glory years of the 1980s.

It wasn’t a surprise to see a few dismiss this argument as being ridiculous.

Perhaps, because if Clemson University did indeed kill the football program, then the enormous revenue football brings the university would dry up. Given university officials are more corporate whores than true academians, I can see this also.

In reality, I think it’s both. Officials would love for football to go away but they’re not about to sacrifice the revenue that comes with it.

Because they suffer through something they resent in exchange for money, they epitomize the classic definition of whore.

As intelligent Clemson fans know, this all started in 1985 when Max Lennon was named University President after serving as an administrator at Ohio State. I’m not getting into details but I will say than when Lennon declared athletics would be subordinate to athletics, you have to remember the context of the time.

Clemson was a rising football power when Lennon took over. So much so that it is my belief that had Danny Ford been given two more years the Tigers would have been playing for a second national title. So when a university president says something like this during an era like that, the only way for that to happen with any expediency is to systematically dismantle football.

You can’t bring academics up quickly at all but what you can do quickly is bring football down.

It’s funny really. For all the academic bluster by Lennon and his cronies I don’t remember Clemson’s academics improving significantly under his watch. If true, all he did was destroy football and did nothing academically. The only thing I remember him doing was spend spend spend and build buildings. And it didn’t stop at Clemson; when he went to Mars Hill College the professors there hated him because of his fascist, corporate ways.

Nonetheless, the intentional destruction of football, no academic improvement and a deluge of cosmetic improvements to the university campus marked Lennon’s Clemson.

Is the same philosophy still present at Clemson?

I’m not certain that Clemson’s current leadership is as fascist as Lennon (maybe it is, I don’t know), but I do think it’s very probable that current officials are still intentionally reigning football in as a pre-emptive measure to keep it from being "too big".

I do know that it is highly prevalent among academians to resent sports in general. While I respect and agree with most of his philosophies, I do think prominent linguist and anarcho-syndicalist Noam Chomsky’s view of sports is a bit over the top. A couple of quotes:

“Sports plays a societal role in engendering jingoist and chauvinist attitudes. They're designed to organize a community to be committed to their gladiators.”

“...it occupies the population, and keeps them from trying to get involved with things that really matter.”

When considering Clemson’s pitifully average to below-average state over the past two decades and the more global view of sports’ perception among academic purists, yes I do think it’s very possible that Clemson still has forces within it whose goal is to keep football down. Very.

But again, these same forces are not about to do what they really want because of one reason only - money. Clemson prefers to dupe its gullible fanbase into believing it is football friendly and there is absolutely no hostility towards it at all in hopes of keeping revenues maxed out.

For all who may disagree with him, at least Dr. Chomsky isn’t a hypocrite when it comes to sports. Clemson officials are.

* * *

What Clemson officials don’t realize, or more likely don’t want to face, is that schools can have strong academics and strong football programs as well. Here is a list of schools that are actually capable of doing both.

• Georgia Tech (2009 ACC champion)
• Texas (2005 & 2009 Big XII champions)
• Ohio State (BigTen champion each year since 2005)
• Harvard (four Ivy League titles since 2001)
• Penn (four Ivy League titles since 2000)
• USC (six straight Pac-10 titles from 2003-2008)
• Oregon (2009 Pac-10 champion and current leader in 2010)
• Florida (three SEC titles from 2000-2008, 2006 & 2008 BCS champion)

What do all these schools have in common? They’re all members of the esteemed 63-member Association of American Universities, America’s version of the UK’s Russell Group (Oxford, Cambridge, etc). Magazine rankings are a beauty pageant, but to be an AAU member is where the real prestige is. All Clemson has is a magazine ranking, something you can manipulate your way up. You can’t manipulate your way into AAU membership. That requires real work.

This is clear, undeniable proof that schools can have top-notch academics and a championship football program simultaneously. But will Clemson fact this indisputable fact? Not a chance.

Considering its long-time goal to make athletics subordinate to academics, in the end Clemson has neither.

Swinney proves he’s immature

First it was the “quacking like ducks” insult, where he basically told fans to shut up about their complaints of a noon kickoff. Okay, fine. We’ll let that slide.

Then came the recent comments where Clemson coach Dabo Swinney said that there’s about five percent of Clemson’s fans who are just crazy because they expect more than they’re willing to give (huh?) and expect this team to show up each week and win every game.

The nerve!

If he thinks that’s crazy, wait’ll he stumbles across one of those nutjobs who demand a full-blown ACC championship.

I could be overlooking one, but by my count that’s twice since the season started that Swinney has lashed out at fans.

So let’s get this straight:

1. His offenses are predictable...at the line of scrimmage by opposing defenses,

2. His defenses have largely been inconsistent since the beginning of the year,

3. He’s hellbent on starting an injured quarterback who’s head is more in Major League Baseball and won’t be here next year instead of a highly-talented guy who has gotten zero meaningful snaps this year and can change the complexity of a game by his mere presence,

4. He neglected to give the rock enough to his top producer (coincidentally the ACC’s top running back) the first part of the year while giving it to a back that dances the night away or throws it to receivers who can’t catch...

But it’s the fans who are crazy?

Well, maybe they are crazy. But unlike Clemson’s head coach, they aren’t stupid.

Regardless, the question in my head about this whole thing is this: who exactly does Swinney think he is, that he has somehow earned the right to scold the fanbase? What heights has Clemson ascended under him to justify his arrogance and condescension?

Atlantic Division title last year? Is that the mountainous ‘height’ you’re referring to? The title he not so much won but rather he fell ass-backward into because of a shitty division and he wouldn’t have been able to do that had it not been for C.J. Spiller? You talking about those lofty heights?

If he was a winning coach, I can understand the ego. But he's a loser.

Here’s a fact - Swinney hasn’t done squat to justify mouthing off to a very justified fanbase who is about as equally pissed with him as they are with Terry Don Phillips and James Barker. Yeah, Phillips and Barker are the core culprits but Swinney is screwing up in his own right. Alienating a rabid fanbase who pays your salary is always asking to get canned.

But maybe he won’t get sacked. It is my belief that Swinney’s job is safe and secure as long as TDP is there, and Swinney knows this. He knows that the fans can’t fire him; only TDP can do that. So perhaps that’s why Swinney feels comfortable lashing out at fans; there are simply no consequences.

Just as a pre-emptive measure, no apology from Swinney, should it be forthcoming, should be accepted. Keep in mind this isn’t he first time he’s been snarky at fans. He'll do it again.

No, he gets no forgiveness. Not for his attitude, and not for his failing the football team, the university and most importantly, the fans who pay hard-earned money in this deplorable economy to pay his unjustified salary. Inexcusable behavior should never be forgiven.

SHUT UP ALREADY ABOUT DANNY FORD!

It’s like clockwork. Or the rising and setting sun. Or the cultural dwarfism of the Tea Party.

“When Danny was coach...”

“Danny would have...”

“DF didn’t have any blah blah blah either...”

“Just like Danny,...”

It’s like the legend of Clemson’s greatest coach ever has become this cloud that hangs over the entire university and an obsession among too many fans.

While Ford was indeed a legend and should not have been fired back in ’90, the fact is he’s been gone for 20 years. He’s not coming back, ever.

Let it go.

Move forward with your life and fandom.

Quit trying to draw extraneous comparisons between some ill-experienced head coach that should have never been hired to begin with and Ford.

Yes, both Ford and Dabo Swinney played at Alabama.

Yes, neither had head coaching nor coordinator experience prior to taking Clemson’s top spot.

Yes, they both seem to have that kuntree-ham-and-cornbread persona that connects with fans.

Eh, well, maybe. Swinney does appear to be burning some bridges with fans now. But I’ll let that one slide, for now.

Yes, they both were successful position coaches who could develop players before taking the head job.

Oh...wait. Oops. That last part isn’t true. Sorry.

Yes, both coached under championship predecessors, so successful in fact that both went on to bigger and better things after Clemson.

Uh, sorry. Oops again. My bad.

Yes, Ford and Swinney have publicly taken jabs at fans for voicing their frustrations.

Damn! Another mea culpa!

Wow, it appears the superficial comparisons that fans make between Swinney and Ford get derailed when a little more digging is done and more facts brought to light.

I can understand Ford being the benchmark for Clemson football. There was never any better a time to be a Clemson fan than there was in the ‘80s. Hell, I’ll throw in 1978 and 1979 out for good measure.

I was there during the 80s. During that time Ford cussed up the officials when that Maryland receiver (or tight end) flubbed a pass in the end zone in Death Valley and dropped it yet the refs called it a touchdown anyway.

And that time when that record-breaking balloon launch occurred.

And that time when the Fridge barreled through North Carolina’s offensive line like it was made of Legos and sacked a Tar Heel receiver during an attempted reverse. Or was it a double-reverse?

And the tie with Boston College in ’82 and remembered thinking “what’s this crap? The NFL has overtimes, why not college?”

And traveling to Blacksburg for an away game with my family and upon arriving at the stadium thinking “this place is too sterile.”

And the win over Stanford in the Gator Bowl where the Stanford band was in trouble for mooning the crowd during its last week’s game or something.

I even remember watching the Clemson-South Carolina game in ’81 in Littlejohn Coliseum with my family and aunts and uncles on closed-circuit TV, as Chuck McSwain ran amok in Columbia that night en route to the win and a shot at the National Championship in Miami.

It’s been a long time and my memory isn’t what it used to be but yeah, I remember all that shit.

So fuck you if you dare question what I know about the endangered species that is the championship Clemson football teams. Any of you 17-30-year-old ignorant suckholes who only think you know what a championship team looks like, shut up and listen to the wise old farts like me who’ve actually seen them, and seen them wearing a paw.

But those days are gone now. Never to return. And neither is Ford.

As sentimental as a stroll down memory lane is, the fact is that does nothing for Clemson’s problems today. Football, in many ways, is still the same basic game it always was. But it has also evolved in many other ways, to the point that it’s time to consider that Ford’s winning strategies may not work in today’s climate.

Some things from yesteryear would work, but others won’t. The fact that players are much bigger and faster mandates a more modern approach.

In short, don’t think for a minute that it’s a lock that Ford’s strategies would work just like it did back then. We don’t know that, and there’s no way we’d ever know that. SO what do we do?

Move on. And let the past go.

Swinney’s leash is much longer than you think

I read all the time about coach Dabo Swinney not having the leash that Bowden had. That he’s not going to get 10 years or whatever.

Come on. Given who the athletic director is, what makes you really think this?

That if the losses pile up and no ACC titles are won this year or next that athletic director Terry Don Phillips will, magically, see the writing on the wall and take appropriate action at that time? If you think this, you don’t know TDP.

Well, I don’t know him either. Personally. But we’ve all read plenty about him to know that Swinney is his golden child. And in any workplace, golden children enjoy a high level of job security that is not afforded to others.

If you’ve ever worked for a typical family-owned business, you know what I’m talking about.

Before Swinney was anointed Clemson’s messiah, TDP clearly exuded a rapidly decreasing level of confidence in former coach Tommy Bowden. What began as a head-shaking disappointment in Bowden after Clemson’s Music City Bowl loss to Kentucky in ’06 ended up with TDP being fed up after losing to Alabama, Maryland and Wake Forest in mid ’08. Phillips fired Bowden (let’s face it, Bowden didn’t voluntarily resign) after the Wake loss, which was four years too late, and immediately promoted Swinney to interim head coach, saying Swinney, somehow, would be auditioning for the permanent gig.

All this did was give TDP a path to make Swinney the permanent coach, as it’s clear that Swinney was TDP’s choice all along after Swinney was chosen amid a sham of a national coaching search by TDP where he reportedly interviewed former Oakland Raider head coach and USC offensive coordinator Lane Kiffin, Oklahoma defensive coordinator Brent Venables, Virginia Tech defensive coordinator Bud Foster and a few others far more qualified that Swinney. Clearly all Swinney had to do to get the job was what Bowden did - beat South Carolina. And beating a stiflingly mediocre Gamecock program somehow seems to be enough to hire and fire at Clemson. Talk about standards.

“But, but....Danny (Ford) didn’t have any coordinator or head coaching experience before being hired and look how that worked out!”

Really? You really think lightning is going to strike twice for Clemson? But okay, I’ll play - but here’s a difference between pre-head coach Ford and pre-head coach Swinney...

Ford clearly coached up successful offensive lines, as highlighted by the Bostic brothers who went on to much NFL success (Joe was with the then-St. Louis Cardinals while Jeff was one of the legendary Hogs (offensive linemen for the Washington Redskins).

Swinney, on the other hand, has fielded chronically failed receiver corps while being their position coach. Dropped passes, which still haunt Clemson today, were prevalent as early as 2006 under Swinney's watch. Moreover, none of his receivers have really excelled at the next level. Chansi Stuckey, who was cut from the New York Jets soon after Rex Ryan took over, is now with the Cleveland Browns. In his fourth year as pro, he’s never started. Tyler Grisham, who I always liked as I thought he was arguably their most reliable receiver and athletic as hell with some of those crazy catches he made, was cut by the Steelers only to be resigned to the practice squad. Jacoby Ford, who is talented and fast, is third string with Oakland. In short, Clemson’s receivers under Swinney are largely not drafted, and what few are end up third string at best or cut within a year or two.

Unlike Ford’s offensive linemen, Swinney’s receivers are undeveloped and unprepared for the NFL. This is not a shot at Clemson’s former players, they are and were talented men. But even the best players look to their coaches to make them better, and Swinney can’t.

Anyway, because Swinney’s hire was 100 percent hunch on TDP’s part, as there is no measurable reason to justify his promotion, there clearly is a level of office politics going on at Clemson. And where there is politics, you can throw out any logic that would ordinarily apply to a given situation. And Swinney’s hire reeks of politics, period.

Because TDP has hung his hat on Swinney, he will hang on to him as long as he can to prove that he isn’t an idiot. Because to fire Swinney next year or the next will be an admission of failure by TDP. And he is way too foolishly proud to admit failure.

To reiterate, to say that if the losses pile up and no ACC titles are won that TDP will come to his senses, should there be any, admit his mistake and fire Swinney is simply not believable. If winning titles was important, Clemson would have hired an upgrade to Bowden instead of going the cheap and lazy route by promoting a position coach who’s players have historically stunk. So let’s not apply logic and common sense to what goes on at Clemson. It’s tempting but it would be incorrect to do so.

I will say that the only way Swinney will get sacked by TDP is if the boosters put ungodly amounts of pressure on him and threaten to withhold monies and other strong-arming techniques to force change. But one thing I’ll never believe is that TDP will fire Swinney on his own free will, even if the situation demands it.

Outside of booster pressure, as long as TDP is at Clemson Swinney’s going nowhere. So that leash is much longer than you’d think.

It’s clear: Swinney is no upgrade from Bowden

And he’s certainly no reincarnation of Danny Ford. If anything, he looks more like Tommy West or Red Parker every day.

* * *

It’s been a while since I wrote/ragged on Clemson’s self-inflicted spiral into football irrelevancy. I was contemplating not writing anything at all; Clemson football has been exposed as a big bowl of head-shaking ick and everyone knows it. Even the apologists and excusers and members of the “I like Dabo but...” crowd see it but they are just too ball-less to face it full-frontal because they ignorantly think that to criticize Clemson or, god forbid, Dabo Swinney is akin to blasphemy. But I figured what the hell.

In the beginning when Swinney proclaimed that all Clemson needed was an oil change, tire rotate and balance, whatever it was he said to sell some legitimacy into his head coaching campaign, he clearly implied that it wouldn’t take long or much to put Clemson over the hump. This has clearly been proven to be snake-oil by the former insurance salesman, as since Swinney took over mid ‘08 Clemson has not looked a lot different from Tommy Bowden’s teams in the win-loss columns.

Lopsided losing record (only one win) versus ranked opponents is the tell. If that doesn’t scream same-old same-old I don’t know what does.

And don’t bring up winning the Atlantic last year to justify his hire. They didn’t win it as much as the rest of the division lost it. Clemson fell ass-backward into the ACC title game, period, and it was more due to C.J. Spiller, now with the Buffalo Bills, than Swinney.

And don’t quantify his enormously average to below-average record by conveniently removing his interim season. That his ’08 audition doesn’t count since he was ‘bailing water’. It does in fact count, and it should. If it didn’t count, it would have played no role in his hire. But he was hired because of his water-bailing, so it counts. The moment athletic director Terry Don Phillips said that Swinney's interim period was his audition for a permanent position was the moment it counted. You can’t have it both ways.

Last year Clemson began the season dirtying their diaper, the crown jewel of that poor excuse of football is losing to a putrid Maryland team that finished 2-10. Clemson lost three of their first five but, by definition of inconsistency, inexplicably went on a hot streak won their next six. Again by definition of inconsistency they inexplicably lost the next two, one to a South Carolina team that was on a skid and had a poor offense, the other to a Georgia Tech team in the ACC title game that they should have, by then, known how to beat.

This year will be more of the same at best. After “tuning up” against two patsies, they blew it against an Auburn team they had a 17-3 halftime lead on, and again against Miami, who is another in a long line of warted ACC teams. Not to mention Clemson’s third straight loss being to a North Carolina team that was missing scads of starters. None of these three teams are really good teams. Just because Clemson loses to a team doesn’t make said team good.

Some good “tune-up” games do for Clemson.

And don’t hand me any crap about how Clemson “played hard” and fell short. We heard that refrain for years under Bowden. Five years from now no one’s going to give a crap how Clemson lost. The only thing that will matter is the black and white: whether they actually won or lost. The ends count, not the means, and Clemson is currently perched at 0-3 against teams with a pulse.

Every team has problems. It doesn’t take a beat journalist to validate our belief in this. But the truly great teams overcome their problems and win in spite of them. Clemson, on the other hand, succumbs to them every single time.

But with Clemson, it’s like a weekly musical chairs of Achilles Heels. One week it’s the linebackers. The next week the linebackers do fine but the line skids its pants. The following week the line does fine but the kicking game costs them a win (or tie, in Auburn’s case). If not the kicking game, it’s the passing game led by a broken quarterback. If not the passing game, then turnovers. Then back to the linebackers and the cycle begins again. It’s endless.

It’s pathetic that Clemson’s entire staff has such little control over the team that there is a new obscure, ass-biting problem each week. Good head coaches have a firm, solid grasp of their team, and Swinney clearly doesn’t. Not only has he lost his grasp of the team, but if what I’m hearing is true that more than one player was laughing and joking it up during the final ticks of the clock, I wonder if he’s lost his players. And when a coach loses his players, it’s over. But that may be a stretch right now but it’s the first thing I thought of when I heard about the laughing and joking on the sidelines. Throw in there that over the past few weeks certain coaches have wised-assed to media or fans (Andre Powell, Kevin Steele, Swinney), and you have a coaching staff that not only has no grasp of the team but also is desperate as they can't take hard questions nor provide legitimate solutions.

So, what will be Clemson’s waterloo next time? Special teams coverage? Turnovers again? Or will they (gasp!) actually win? Even if they win, will they look all warted up doing it? I do think Clemson will win. I really don’t know why, I just do, maybe it’s because I haven’t had my Seroquel yet.

To compound this, Swinney seems to be sounding a bit, well, Bowdenish, in that he’s come up with a mantra for losing: “correctable/fixable mistakes”, in hopes of keeping the fans gassed up on false hope.

Funny, Clemson had “correctable mistakes” weeks ago after they lost to Auburn. Were those mistakes corrected before the Miami game? And if they somehow were, what new “correctable mistakes” cropped up that the coaches didn’t anticipate? I direct you to the ‘grasp’ paragraph above.

“Correctable mistakes”. Make note of this Clemson fans; this will be a common catchphrase from Swinney throughout his tenure, just as “oil change” was in his ’08 campaign and “one play away” was for Bowden as now we’re led to believe by Swinney that Clemson is one correction or fix away.

I wonder how long it’ll be before Swinney begins using “fifty percent of all the teams that played Saturday lost”.

“But, but but....Swinney wasn’t the one on the field! This is the players’ fault!” Really, how dumb are you? Are you so stupid to think that it’s not the coaches’ job to prepare the team for play, and then ensure the team plays as prepared? This isn’t the NFL with grown men in their mid-20s to mid-30s who are (physically) mature and being paid millions. These are late-teens to early 20s, and they are not mature enough yet to prepare themselves accordingly. In college, the coaches are crucially responsible for prepping the players, unlike in the NFL. Nebraska coach Bo Pelini once said that when the team wins you credit the players, and when it loses you blame the coaches, and that’s how it’s gotta be. And when a team loses as much as Clemson has, especially against ranked teams, you have to question the legitimacy of Swinney’s hiring.

This all said, this really isn’t a Swinney bashfest. Well, maybe just a little given his penchant for oil changes and correctable mistakes, but the fact is Swinney just took a job offer. Much like one Ken Hatfield a million years ago. Can’t blame Swinney for taking it but that doesn’t exonerate the fact that he’s clearly in over his head. This cluster of a program falls squarely on Phillips, James Barker and the Board, and partially on Katie Hill, the Queen to Phillips’ Sleepy/Dopey combo dwarf. Although they didn’t create this (this foundation was laid out by Max Lennon and Bobby Robinson), Phillips, Barker and Board just built on it. Which is why Swinney is in this pickle to begin with.

* * *

In his post-game interview after the North Carolina debacle Swinney stated, “Sooner or later you’ll bust through.”

Sooner...or later? Given your “oil change” sales pitch, ‘later’ is not an option, coach Swinney. You yourself took that off the table from the beginning. Of course it doesn’t surprise me now you’re using it to save face.

But I do agree that Clemson football is only in need of an oil change to get over the hump. Too bad Swinney is no mechanic.